listening to "take my breath away" by Berlin

went to sch earlier today.. watched exorcist (for my 5th time i think..) then had armando's class.. after that, diego and hitomi followed me home cos i forgot my film and then we went to the darkroom cos my class booked the darkroom for 3 hrs...

in the darkroom, we had abit of a problem with not enough developers.. becos of some bastard. I HATE THAT FUCKING BASTARD. i never liked him since yr 1.. what a fucking asshole. I wont say who.. but some of u may know.. made me, diego and hitomi SUPER SUPER pissed. but anyway, my film was pretty wasted.. i had some nice photos for once and i fucking forgot to get rid of the date... so it looks really EXTREMELY stupid with a date imprinted in the bottom of EVERY pic.

why am i so stupid.....????? WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?
ugh.

other than that bloody bastard i can safely say i almost love my class entirely. almost is good enough ok? at least i have managed to get some pretty good friends... ie. teletubbies... @_@?

blah. im tired... doing research for photog class tmr... byebye

listening to "Mad World (alternative ver)" by Michael Andrews feat. Gary Jules [Donnie Darko Ost]

ytd, i went out to meet hitomi, diego and serene after their rock climbing.. met then we went to lau pa sat to eat satay and rojak.. we sat there for a couple of hours and talked and talked and talked... everything just came out.. lol..

ive been thinking stupid tots again.

i dunno why... i hate it.

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces

Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere
Going nowhere

Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No expression

Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
'Cause I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very very
Mad world
Mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday
Happy birthday

Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen
Sit and listen

Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me
No one knew me

Hello teacher tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me
Look right through me

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very very
Mad world
Mad world
enlarged in your world
Mad world

....

i forgot to add that i FINALLY watched labyrinth and Donnie DARKO!!!! XD

o m g. lol... Donnie darko is absolutely amazing. and labyrinth makes me melt... @_@ lol...

o.. and ive started S.I again. after stopping for almost 3 months.. why is it that i cannot stop for more than 3 months.. (other than that time when i stopped for almost a yr.)

BAH.

watching desperate housewives.. hehe.. (o and they're showing Ghost whisperers!!!)

today i developed my first roll of negatives in the darkroom! it was so incredibly fun! :3 hehe.. ive done the enlarging and development for the paper before but not developing the negs.. haha.. next week is the printing.. cant wait.

anyway, ive been really working myself alot this few days.. well, i try to anyway... so ytd (sunday), i sat at the library for abt 5 hrs just flipping photo books and stuff then met up with chunyi and my sis to go arnd and shoot stuff and eat at maxwell market. today, i went for class then went out shooting again... ah.. i love shooting with film, i dont have to bother to keep retaking shots and stuff.. haha.. i dun remember how i noe what im taking when i was in secondary sch.. but photo duty felt the most prestigous to me at that time.. lol! :)

aa.. i never tot i'd say it... but i kinda miss sec school for the fact that we had photo duty! ahaha...

blah.. k.. sian.. going back to desperate housewives.

listening to "space oddity" by David bowie

the past two days have been a blast. :)

firstly.. thursday night was our date with francis to the arts house. haha.. we watched the film on Henri cartier bresson and went to his exibit... it was absolutely amazing... the film made me smile throughout the whole thing.. haha.. then on our way back with my closer classmates (i say OUR as in me and my sis), we took pics with the lomo fisheye cam.. haha.. i hope they look great~ all 36 delicious exposures of them~ lol.. (no.. its not mine.. i borrowed the cam from hitomi and she borrowed my colorsplash.)

ytd was great as well.. how can it not be?? when i have 6 hours with francis shooting photos n having fun! :D we went to an art gallery and to objectifs ytd, plus went shooting around.. found special places (rooftops!), took more fisheye pics, more b/w photos, more more more... and we all even bot a present for francis! ahaha.. cos he was kidding that the rubik's cube was a special lomo because only he knows how to use it.. and while we all walked back to the studio after our shooting (it was so tiring!), we saw someone selling it on the floor for one dollar.. haha.. so we bot it for him.. he looked so happy though! :3

haha.. then after that, i still went shooting with some of my classmates... crawled here and there...

actually.. ive never had such motivation to go shooting before.. i guess its because i wasnt alone... im scared when im alone... u noe? haha... ar well..

as for today... i need to go shopping for all my sch stuff... and take more pics! @_@ i.need.money...

I won't cry when the silver lining shows,
but you're right, you understand,
you ride with both hands.
Worrying is the breathing that you need,
So there won't be far to fall,
you mustn't climb tall..

-mew, white lips kissed

listening to "lullaby" by The Cure (i love this song so much...)

sigh... depressed.

anyway, just did finish my illustration homework.. im kinda proud of it.. but i gotta thank my sis for guiding me.. she's the pro in all these kinda things.. @_@ i get confused too easily..

hm... i went to suntec just now.. was desperately searching for 'ghost world' the movie at carrefour cos i saw it there the other time... but its nowhere to be found!!! :( and before that, i saw a 'mama and the papas' cd! i wanted it so bad.. but i didnt have the cash... arg..

walked arnd, played some games at the arcade.. then came home.. tuesdays are boring.

cant wait for thursday night.

argg.... i feel depressed...

listening to "John, im only dancing" by david bowie

sigh.. why are there so many problems going on now... ;_;

hm.. anyway, i watched C.R.A.Z.Y. yesterday!! ARGGGGGG!!! finally.. i loved it!! it was just incredible... french films always have that magical quality that only french movies have. sigh.. made me cry too.. Good movie.. please go watch if u guys are free. but its more ex than usual i think.. cos its an exclusive showcase.. boy i love cathay! :3

after that, me and my sis walked arnd city hall and stuff.. took pics for homework and stuff... then walked arnd boat quay but went on back in the direction of city hall becos we forgot my sister's specs.. lol..

and today? photography was fun! haha..

but design drawing sucks.. though i had fun with my classmates... chatting about brokeback mountain and porn.. (eh hem..)
haha.. we're all appealing for design drawing to be replaced by more photography.. heh.

then after that, i left with hitomi, diego, leon and serene for peninsula.. went to get film and to get my cam checked again.

thank god the uncle was so nice.. he changed my cam to a MUCH muchhhh better cam than my previous one.. and he gave everyone who went with me a tee like the one he gave me.. lol..

im happy with the new cam.

yep.. gtg.

listening to "Bring me the disco king" by David bowie

damn. i love david bowie. lol..

today was a rather unproductive day... although i did get started on my homework for digital media in the morning.. and i just wrote down a little bit about chingay for my research.. @_@ sigh.. so much work to do.. but im just wasting time..
not to mention the free airing of disney, nick and cartoon network channels aint helping....

blah!

and i was supposed to go out to shoot my roll finish for darkroom on monday... i wanted to go watch l'enfant at the same time as well... ARG. but its no longer showing at the picture house. Grr... i tot it was ending this week but its goneeeee. nvm.. lots more shows to catch!!

and i think i shld sleep soon.

listening to "ordinary world" by duran duran.

ive been thinking.. in the bathroom.. as i took a shower.. about the diff kinda photographers and which grp i'd fit in.. to me there are 5 types of photographers...

1. the aesthetic loving artsy fartsy ones (who conceptualize and think more than they shld),
2. the techno wiz (the ones who have the memory of an elephant... they remember all the lens and stuff...),
3. the photojourn photographers (the wordy and more intelligent ppl who have a higher IQ),
4. the anything-also-can photographers,
5. and the I'll-shoot-anything-i-want-because-this-is-my-hobby-n-im-rich kind of photographers...

Im not bragging but i think i belong to the first. haha.. all i ever think of is surrealistic shots, conceptual shots, fashionistic shots and fine art shots... o.. and of cos street photography which satisfies my inner photo journalist w/o actually risking my life.

haha.. ok.. i think alot in the bathroom.

other than that.. today's real fun. and i think its the best day ive had in sch.. ever. 6hrs of francis ng. haha. :3 he brot us out for a drink (paid for it too!), brot us out for a shoot, let us go for a talk by darren slyvester (MY GOD. i love his work.) amongst other stuff. it was great.. and we've all set a date for next thursday.. to catch the henri cartier bresson film at the arts house. :)

and then i went arnd peninsula and adelphi and looked arnd.. before i left with my sis.

and now im home. but lots of work to do, photos to shoot and concepts to conceptualize. sigh.. i love being an art student.

anyway, that doesnt mean i havent been thinking of all those depressing stuff... well, i have.. and if i dont, then ill have nothing to make my art out of. you noe what i mean? YOUR ART IS YOU.. recently ive been thinking abt why ppl see us (problematic ppl) as wanting attention. mayb i can do something on that.. hm...

alright.. gtg.. too much thinking..

listening "bad day" by daniel powter..

im sitting with asano.. haha.. i must have neglected him for the longest of time.. sigh.. i love him very much. :3

anyway, had an ok day i guess... i read my horoscope in the morning and it said that i'll be glad something is cancelled... so i went to sch thinking how is that possible? since armando wasnt that sort of lecturer.. but guess what? CLASS WAS CANCELLED~!! haha...

what a coincidence eh?

ar well.. so i had nothing to do.. hung out with the guys before meeting chunyi and simmie at tcc.. then sis finished class.. so we all sat there chatting and laughing.. :)
then we went to S.A.M for fun then off to suntec cos simmie needed to go to her chiropractor.. which.... is VERY scary.. the sound of the punching or whatever it is they do... sounds so horrid! *shudder*..

haha... then we came home.. yep.. thats it. now im just waiting for time to pass.. wanna watch super nanny at 10pm and then wait for tmr to come.. 6 hours of photography!!! WOOHOO! with francis ng! WOOHOO. haha.

kk.. im gonna get my anti-eyebrow at that heeren tattoo place.. cos its cheap! :3 and i like the lady there. yay~

sigh.. i still want a bridge.. and im waiting to get baldwin to pierce the other side of my lip. CANT WAIT!!! :)

i just wanna add that... i'm quite glad that im moving forward in life right now... at least i have a little bit of motivation to persue what i love. no.. not the band thing.. i mean my photography! and my classmates have made me love going to sch again. :3

nothings gonna stop me now!

listening to "that thing you do" by the wonders (on youtube..)

sigh... I FINALLY GOT MY INTERNET BACK. thanks chunz! :)

life without the internet really sucks... made me realize how much i depend on it.. its scary.. man... i think everybody shld live without the internet for awhile... it makes you wake up.

haha.. ar well.. anyway, lots of events passed.. but i dont think ill elaborate..

anyhoo, ytd me, my sis and chunz went out with simmie to celebrate her bday.. we went to altazzaq or however u spell it... the egyptian restaurant at arab street that we always go to.. we had fun.. talked abt rubbish and stuff.. other places were filled with ppl watching football.. and we cld hear them scream GOALLLLL!! haha.. nice..

before that i had class till 820 so it was nice to actually relax after that.. we shld go out more often like last time.. i miss those days.. :(

ar well... everyone has their lives to live..

damn it.... i hate not being able to go online at home... i want to cry... im blogging from sch... on the mac.. and i cant access my hotmail.... SOBS.

shit. and my digital media lecturer.. TALKS TOO MUCH. so bloody cocky... -_-

listening to placebo's meds album..

i m so unlucky. this is the fourth day.. i went to the pc show and got my cable from the guy... then i come home and from 9 till now.. im still transferring stuff into the hard disk.. so i can reformat the comp.. but problem is.. I CANT FIND MY MODEM's INSTALLATION disc... how the hell will i be able to get the internet back after that huh? is it possible to just save the modem program file and transfer back into the comp when im done with reformating? arg..

anyway, i went for a 6 hours photography seminar just now... oman... my butt was so numb.. but the speakers made it so worth it! we had Eddie Sung, Stefen Chow and Geoff Ang!! GEOFF ANG!! haha.. gave me back my inspiration.. thank god. cos sch's starting.. and im sure i need alot of that...

at first i tot the seminar was some sort of media thing that consist of a rock concert and photography talks. but turns out i read my sms wrongly.. haha.. and it was rock concert photography! and followed by extreme photography and then fashion photography respectively.

i saw a few of my cocky photography seniors.. haha..

so my day is just fine.. lovely indeed.. cept for the fact that im afraid this may be the last time i use the net cos i cant find my damn modem installation disc!!! GRRRRRRRRR.

watching xmen on tv.

ok.. someone pleaseeeeeee explain to me WHY THE HELL AM I SO DOWN ON LUCK? whyyyyyy?

i went to sch just now.. and saw the class list.. there is 4 ppl in my class whom i hate.. taking PHOTOGRAPHY with me.. fuck. im so frustrated.. then i saw miguel and i told him.. and he said.. "Don't Care LAH....!" so.. ok.. i guess i can try and ignore them...

then i went to the pc show and i have to get a external hard drive.. so me and my sis shared cash and bot a 80GB portable external hard drive for sch use.. and GUESS WHAT? the pack they gave us was open and inside.. instead of the cable they gave us a fucking SCREWDRIVER.
ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

WHYWHYWHY.

anyway, they say bad things come in three.. so i hope tmr will be fine... ill go back to the pc show and exchange my hard disk drive... and then go for the photography seminar.. blah..

whyyyyy...

listening to "love will tear us apart" by Joy division.

why?? why cant i even enjoy my last few days of holidays?

yesterday, i was supposed to go meet alvin and the rest for steamboat.. but guesswhat.. i took the train all the way to marina bay and they cancelled. gawd... so me and my sis loitered arnd orchard...
... i was at taka and accidently hit this guy who was carrying soup on a tray.. it spilled on my leg a little and my arm is now bruised.. i said sorry but the guy just gave me the ultimate death glare... fuck.. it wasn't entirely my fault.. he didnt look either.. asshole..

and then i saw a whole bunch of those china students wearing visual kei.. fuck them. ARG. its not that i am against all china ppl.. (i have china frens la....) its just that why do they like to spoil everything? WHY? blah..

after those two incidents, i was so fucking depressed.. ive never been so depressed at orchard before.. bah.. well, after that.. me and my sis went to macs for dinner.. and guess what? who did we have to see? SHELDON TAY. lol.. his frens are cool.. and he was doing some signal to us like "what-u-doing-here-orh-u-eating-ar-byebye" kind of thing.. haha.. then we went borders.. and then went home. boring.

THEN TODAY? my goodness... we went to my auntie's house and left for changi beach after we packed food.. and when we reached there, we sat down for like 10mins and it starts raining!!! ARGGGGGGGG. WHY? WHY DOES IT HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME? grr... so we sat under some shelter for the next hour waiting for the rain to stop before we came back to my house..

blah.. so much for a picnic.. came home and my aunt wanted to watch something scary so i let her watch 'shutter'.. and although its like my 5th time watching, i just suddenly got a little creeped out.. cos i remembered my first lesson next week might be a darkroom lesson.. *shudder*
not to mention the lead actor's character has the same nickname(that my family call me) as me.. and he uses polaroids in the show. haha..

bleah.. why cant i just enjoy myself? hopefully the next 3 days wld be fine.. or i'd end up killing someone..